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Feeling Like An Outsider? – by Martin Kimeldorf

OutsiderChatting off-topic one day with one of my favorite editors, Deborah Levine,  I talked  about feeling like an outsider at age 7 in my own family. Perhaps she had not discussed her similar feelings before because she embraced the topic and told about similar feelings in her childhood. Deborah told her mom how she believed she belonged to gypsy parents who must have left her on the doorstep.  Then without surprise or forethought she asked her mom, Would you please return me to where I really belong?” Her mom was amused by her hyperactive daughter with the quick mind and tongue.

I then shared with Deborah that I felt I’d been left behind by aliens as part of an intergalactic experiment by my far-away family. This was not as far fetched as you might think when I explain how my father was a scientist working for the government in Radiation Biology. He had security clearances, and this was to explain why he was gone a lot to places he could not speak about upon return. was often on the road to places he could not tell us about.  It was also the 1950s when the red-scare atmosphere filled the very air and our television programing the paranoia of the McCarthy era.

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